Mark Twain - Quotes, Citations, Ideas...

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

Mark Twain

It's better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than open it and remove all doubt

Mark Twain

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

Mark Twain

Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

Mark Twain

All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure.

Mark Twain

A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.

Mark Twain

The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.

Mark Twain

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.

Mark Twain

The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read.

Mark Twain

Wrinkles should merely indicate where the smiles have been.

Mark Twain

Out of all the things I have lost, I miss my mind the most.

Mark Twain

Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.

Mark Twain

Worrying is like paying a debt you don't owe.

Mark Twain

The trouble is not in dying for a friend, but in finding a friend worth dying for.

Mark Twain

To do good is noble. To tell others to do good is even nobler and much less trouble.

Mark Twain

Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.

Mark Twain

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

Mark Twain

A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.

Mark Twain

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.

Mark Twain

I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.

Mark Twain

Everyone is a moon, and has a dark side which he never shows to anybody.

Mark Twain

Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.

Mark Twain

If Christ were here there is one thing he would not be—a Christian.

Mark Twain

Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

Mark Twain

Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.

Mark Twain

Nothing that grieves us can be called little: by the eternal laws of proportion a child's loss of a doll and a king's loss of a crown are events of the same size.

Mark Twain

Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.

Mark Twain

Kindness is a language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

Mark Twain

My books are water; those of the great geniuses is wine. Everybody drinks water.

Mark Twain

Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to.

Mark Twain

When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.

Mark Twain

History doesn't repeat itself, but it does rhyme.

Mark Twain

If voting made any difference they wouldn't let us do it.

Mark Twain

If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.

Mark Twain

 

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